I am so terribly, terribly sorry to hear of your loss, and I can only imagine the sadness this has caused you. I was of course very shocked to hear the news about Kubilay Andrew.

As I explained on the phone, I was expecting him to come and stay with me on October 21st, and was very concerned that I had not heard from him: I know that he was an incredible traveller, and often unexpectedly in some far-flung place - but also that he was very communicative and would always have explained if there was some reason why he could not meet an appointment. Naturally I tried his mobile number many times, and it was only on Thursday that I found your telephone number, which he had given me some years ago when I was due to visit Turkey. I was only in Istanbul for one night, and he was in Britain at the time, although I did meet up with his friend Mine.

I regret that I have not called you sooner, although I realise that there was nothing I could have done; I am sorry, too, that I rang his grandmother in Leeds first, as I feel I have only added to her distress. But these are all things one cannot know in advance, I suppose.

Andrew was a very dear friend of mine. I have not seen him on any regular basis, largely because he has been travelling so much, but whenever he has been in London he has invariably got in touch, and I regard him very much as one of my close friends.

As I explained on the telephone, I shared a flat (60 Dundas Street) with Andrew, Sarita and others for just a few months back in 1995, which was when I first met him; I was not there for long myself, and moved on in the autumn of that year. It is very sad: Sarita has seen little of him over the last few years as she has had difficulties of her own in life, but on 21st October, she and I met up in London to surprise him on his arrival with a small 'reunion'. I hardly need say how sad it is to hear what has happened. I recall that the last time I spoke to him was about a week before that, when we were arranging when he would stay with me. He said nothing of being attacked: I wonder was this after that? These have been very difficult weeks for you both: I am so sorry.

I am so stunned to think that such an incredible and unique person is lost like this. Andrew was always the most bouyant and kindhearted person: full of incredibly energy and noise and fun, sometimes too much so! I am a more obviously moody person myself, and there have been times when I have felt overwhelmed by his energy - yet at other times the two of us have had real fun together - usually just through love of talking, and love of language. Andrew and I had a number of things particularly in common: both Andrews of course (hence my nickname for him was Junior, being a couple of years older myself, and his for me Namesake when we shared a flat), both only children (and therefore I can feel all the more for you both), both with a talent for mimicry, ever trying to outdo each other by speaking in different accents and voices and so on...

I feel sad that Andrew had found it difficult to find his right place in life, and has drifted between jobs and studies and different countries in recent months. Often he has asked my advice or talked to me about these things. I think it is sadly a common situation for well educated and highly gifted people like him (I have never known anyone who knew even remotely as many languages as him) to feel directionless in life.

I am a writer and editor by profession, self-employed and working for various magazines and newspapers in London. This September I was commissioned to write a book about using the internet for finding jobs, and Andrew was in fact one of the people I quoted in the book: he had told me of how he was in Kathmandu and applied for a job with the British civil service from there using the internet - it made a perfect example of how things can be done with this technology. It is only too sad that he was still hoping to shape his own career. My book is due to be published in January, and I feel perhaps I would like to dedicate it to him.

Andrew was also someone who found it very easy to make friends, although had more difficulty with relationships, and often spoke of wanting to meet the 'right person' for him. I do not how much of his personal life he has shared with you both (although I know some of it has been difficult for him to share with his family, as you probably realise), but I do know that although his personal life has indeed been difficult for him, this was a sincere wish. He was a terribly loving person, and clearly wanted nothing more than to give his love and energy and kindness and friendship to a person who could return it. It is sad he did not find that person - a difficult search for everyone in life.

In many ways, on thinking of him these last few days, I see how he was perhaps quite reckless in life, and I suppose the sad and difficult manner of his death reflects that. I feel perhaps there was more sadness in his heart than he allowed even his friends to see. As one of them, of course I regret not being able to help him more, and now it is too late. But he was also someone who did live his life to the full, and did many things he wanted to. In the jobs he has had, I feel also that he has achieved a great deal for someone who was not at all old; and in the many friendships he made he will truly be lovingly remembered. Naturally I can think of many people who were close to him and would want to know this sad news - although no one wants such news, of course. Unfortunately I do not know how to get in touch with all of them (I have never known someone with friends across so many countries!), but there are some who I can reach. I do not know how many of his friends you know, but two people apart from Sarita who I am particularly thinking of are BJ Smart (Andrew met him in America at Duke University, and he now lives outside London) and Maja Jurcic, also a friend of Mine's. Another is an Italian friend, Elisa di Napoli, who will be hard to track down, but I shall certainly try. Perhaps another time I can tell you more of his friendships if you would like me to.

I am very glad to have made contact with you, although of course it is for a very sad reason. But if there is anything I can do at all, please do let me know, and if you are in Britain at all at any time, I would very much like to meet you. I am always contactable via this email address, and my address is 64 Highlands Court, Gipsy Hill, London SE19 1DS, telephone +44 20 8761 6752. Perhaps you could send me your address too? I know that Sarita would like to write to you ­ she shares a flat with my girlfriend in north London, and I see her regularly. Please do tell me of the web site you mentioned, too.

With my sincerest and most heartfelt condolances,